A long, flowing stream of inner monologue in a character in a book, a play or a movie is difficult to write. There are certain rules, and I´ll respect them when I get to work with this in my novel to be.
But today on this blog the stream of consciousness will be my writing voice.
Today has been beautiful with breathtaking Fall sunshine and a comfortable ritual around noon. There is inner peace and calm, and my three philosophical cats and my little old wise dog are playing and sleeping all over the house.
It was a healing and thanksgiving ritual. I feel in balance with nature and know that I have said my thanks to the Universe and Mother Earth for the abundance in my life.
Yes, abundance on a budget is possible. If you only dare to be creative with what you already have, and if you work hard to get the best out of everything, it is possible.
My abundance may not be in money terms. But money can´t buy you love, friendship and family. For my family and my friends I´m grateful. They are the reason for me being able to live a happy and content life.
I owe them everything. for they are exceptional people. The kind that are always there whatever happens. It is so rare in our modern world, where almost everything seems to be about making enough money to buy the latest unnecessary gadget.
Living with bipolar disorder and social anxiety would not be so easy-going were they not in my life, so I´m grateful indeed.
For the love of my life I´m grateful too. I have a husband who is as tough a buddy as me. He has – like I- been dragged through hell on quite a few occasions. But we are still here together, so I believe in love at first sight.
I count my blessings, and I´m content with life.
There are enough of mundane sorrows and challenges to overcome, so a positive outlook on things in an absolute necessity here. I also know positiveness works a great deal better than negativity and disbelief.
Life experience is worth gold no matter the age at the time, when an issue arises that demands a larger degree of human skills than else. It makes the whole difference, and the outcome often depends on it.
So is trial by error, in time I call it lessons to learn throughout life.
Have I learned all my lessons then ? No, not yet, I say learning is a lifelong must.
But I have learned some and then some. Some would say more than enough, did they know the span of my story to tell. I will say I have learned most of my part.
Well, shit happens from time to time. And I just know than when the shit hits the fan, then it´s time to step into character and to show what stuff you are made of. I´m born of the stars, so I kick ass when I have to.
And have to, that I have to do every day for the rest of my life. I have to have something to believe in, I have to feel inner peace and freedom from restraints, and I have to write about it.
So, I sit here, ready to step into character, every single moment of the day ? Oh yes, and believe me, I´m as ready as can be.
I want the best out of everything every day of my life. I need happiness, inner peace, a good health and a kind attitude.
All that has been given me by the Universe. Others might call it chance, but I don´t believe in coincidences of any kind.
Thanksgiving and healing were the core elements in my Mabon Sabbat/Fall Equinox today. Healing is always a fine goal to try to achieve, and I often work with healing both in witchcraft and in writing.
Where is the healing part of writing ? To me, the healing moment arise during the writing process with a feeling of being content and happy about being brutally honest when writing.
There is something elusive about sitting there behind the keyboard, making written words out of thoughts in the moment. There are long hauls of hard work, and then there is this sudden feeling of knowing that you are on to something right.
If the feeling lasts long enough, I might be lucky that day and be able to write for a couple of hours with breaks whenever necessary. That is when the downside of e.g. osteoarthritis takes its toll on my physical strength.
Or when I need to rethink a sentence or a paragraph a break is also a good choice.
Today I´m not going to be less than honest and say that I only write about what I know something about. I write with my life experience, not about it. My personal story is not involved in my novel to be. It is involved here, but that is rather by choice than need.
I like to write in different worlds, and I like to learn about the behavior of human beings to be able to know myself better. My aim with writing is to write something worth reading.
The remains of the day have been calming and ensuring. We made a bonfire in the garden and sat for about an hour and enjoyed the dance of the flames with zero wind.
As I´m writing, I´m thinking about the ups and downs of being a writer. The ups are the easy ones to describe, it is whenever the editing part is done. The downs are difficult not to build up inside as excuses for not doing the long hours of practice that is necessary.
If you want lo learn and grow as a writer, I believe that as with other life areas, writing is a skill, an art, a craft where learning also takes a lifetime. It needs to be cared for and practiced in as many sessions as possible.
Learning by doing, so to speak.
I know that there will be mistakes along the way, but I learn so much from reading other authors, both famous and known by few, so I believe it is healthy for your writing voice to be read against other voices.
Only that way is it possible to evolve and learn to dare to follow whatever rules that fit the writing project and to break the rules whenever appropriate to the inner voice that guides your writing.
Another challenging trial-by-error experience is to be read. It is a wonderful privilege that I take seriously and try to care as much as possible for.
Today my thoughts goes out to all those wonderful, free writers all over the world that choose to follow their hearts and write close up to life in everyday reality.
Keep on writing and inspiring. And Blessed Be.
Today´s pictures are of my daily ritual altar set up for the celebration of Fall Equinox, where day and night are of equal lenght, and my husband´s beautiful bouquet and mini pumpkins. A time for balance work, divination and preparations for winter.
It was my first ritual this month, and it was followed up by a sandwich and a glass of cold milk. Coming up for 2020 I´ll try to prepare my own recipes for another twist of the senses, so there after a ritual will be something delicious to eat and drink.
After all, a lot of the merry meet traditions are about feasting together.
As always I feel cleansed and as reborn after a ritual. Now, I sit with lit candles, a cup of warm chai tea and comfortable clothing.
We have done our part of balance work today, with thanksgiving at the ritual and releasing of what no longer serves us over the bonfire in the garden.
Concerning divination the Tarot cards were fair and just, but I´ll need a longer interpretation of my nine card spread, which I usually do the day after a ritual, because I like to combine my inner gut feeling with a good night´s sleep before interpreting any kind of divinatory method.
Preparations for winter are beginning little by little here. The garden needs to be tended to, and our house needs some fall cleaning, as we typically also do at the Spring Equinox. And we need to buy groceries whenever the price is right.
Before everybody goes bananas over Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas. Do a witch like me celebrate that ? Yes. Of course, I do, there are children in my family and my 81-year-old father. But I celebrate it downplayed with less focus on material things and most focus on the family aspect of it.
To write in a stream of consciousness is difficult, but I still keep trying, because I´m writing my thoughts as they arrive without editing the first draft.
The difficult part shows up when it is time to begin editing and prepare for publishing. And when I then don´t see the resemblance when comparing to other works… Then it is necessary to keep the faith and keep on writing, until the time comes to write the conclusion.
A long, flowing stream of inner monologue shown by my writing voice rather than a character in a novel. No, not yet, I need to write it first, and it will take me quite some time. I´ve only begun at the work of creating strong characters and a solid backstory without too many details and descriptive stuffing.
But I´m getting closer to it every day, and I just know that it won´t be long, before I sit and write my first novel. I have half a page written and a lot of notes to keep tack of on a storyboard, which will be my priority for a couple of weeks.
Word counting has helped me write better and write more. It gives me a goal to work with, and it is a great feeling when such a goal as 2,000 words at a time is reached. It now only takes me a couple of hours to write and rewrite, where it not so long ago could last days.
Now it is time for the conclusion and for today that´ll be that the ritual went as planned and that I´ve only begun practicing the art of writing in a stream of consciousness.
There is probably plenty of room for improvement, but you got to begin somewhere, and I can only use myself and my knowledge and life experience to try and play with them mesmerizing words.
I have felt an inner monologue as I`ve been writing this blog post. But to actually feel what it is, that is the tricky part to both tell and show.
But what I´ve learned from today is that it is never a shame to at least give it a try. And the Sun is always above the black skies. That is worth noticing, as the dark half of the year now rules the world here in the Northern Hemisphere.
There is also beauty in darkness, and without it, how would we know light ? In the dark season there is room and time for creative projects and shadow work. That will be the theme in my next big Sabbat, Samhain on October 31 2019.
No, dot not run from darkness. The dark season is about looking inwards and review what the light half of the year has brought forth. And to plan for the coming year as well.
On Monday September 30 2019 I´ll try to write a session about 1st person point of view and what to expect in October 2019. I will keep on writing every Monday and Friday the year out, but now I need to go plan what to write about next month.
Once again, thank you for your time, dear reader.
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