Sitting in an old creaky chair in my creative den an icy cold Monday morning, I´m contemplating how it will be to plan my novel in early spring 2020. I´m preparing myself, my family and my friends for a unique journey in which things will run fast across the keyboard.
On Black Friday of all days possible, I found five simple A4 notebooks. They are for my novel, for the handwritten parts of it, for countless hours of equal parts of fun and fear. The joy of writing versus the fear of not being good enough is my cross to bear as a writer and as a human being.
It all began with four simple sentences that soon became an idea, many notes, and half a page with dialog. Before I knew of it, I just felt that I had to do this. For I have stories to tell, I want to write the novel I have always wanted to write.
Now that the journey is ongoing, it is like steering a ship on the loose in a sea of turmoil. It is hard work, but I can´t help but love to do it. I admit frankly that I´m a writing addict, and it is becoming more and more obvious in my daily life.
I can´t wait to get a pen and paper or the keyboard in the mornings, I always carry a notebook with me wherever I go, and I´m always on the lookout for snappy dialog and relevant conflicts. Form early morning to late evening, you can find me writing on something.
I´m sharpening my tools, preparing for a whole year with almost endless possibilities. It is a true privilege to be able to put aside 365 days for one´s favorite activity. Without any other deadlines than my own, which is December 31, 2020.
Planning a novel also means re-arranging your plans as the main idea develops. I´ve bought a corkboard that will be my storyboard when I begin to plot for real in February 2020. Right now, I have a short outline of my story, but I´m not ready to work with the outlining process just yet.
I need to finish my notes, to practice the techniques I´ve studied, and to attain as much knowledge as possible about psychological thrillers. I want to be well-equipped before I embark on the second part of this long journey, the drafting period from March 1, 2020.
And then life happens in between writing and contemplating. Tomorrow, we are going to the hospital with my husband for some answers that we need to the questions we don´t dare to ask. It has been two weeks with the kind of ticking clock that nobody wants near.
I will consecrate a healing candle for my husband tonight accompanied by a prayer of release. It is a long time to wait for answers, and I´m grateful it is over by tomorrow. We´ve been through hell, my husband and I.
From general to detailed research
Day by day, I work my way through the vast territory of writing a psychological thriller. I just finished my general research. Now it is time for the details, the setting, the techniques behind it all. My ring binder filled with notes will also contain maps, drawings of scenes, and lists with plot twists.
My plans also include upgrading my free version of Grammarly, as I find it extremely helpful in my daily writing. I´m currently studying American English grammar, and I know that I make some mistakes here on this blog. I´ll try to be as correct as possible, the more I learn.
But as with everything else, my budget needs to balance, so I´ll buy tthe upgrade from March 1, 2020, where I begin writing the first draft for my novel. In the meantime, I´ll do my best not to make too many silly mistakes here.
This sugary sweet Christmas season is in no way matched by the plot in my novel. A psychological thriller needs to thrill the reader on the edge of the seat. That and nothing less is what awaits me in the new year.
I believe that if what I write is scaring me, then there should be a chance that it will scare the readers too. And I´m writing about what scares me the most. That is the way we humans treat each other psychologically when the shit hits the fan, pardon my French.
I have experienced enough for a lifetime with other human beings, in high as well as low places, for better or for worse. But nevertheless, humans never stop to amaze me. We´re busy enough taking care of physical violence, but with it psychological counterpart, we act like cowards.
Take e.g. mocking at the workplace, where many unfortunately have to work together with a psychologically mean boss who can spread an intolerable atmosphere. It should be considered much more serious to treat people like shit, just because you can get away with it.
I have personally experienced domestic violence, where the main issue was psychological warfare. It took me several years to recover from a narcissistic and very little man. Today, I´m married to a wonderful and sweet man who treats me with love and respect.
In my younger days, life took place in the fast lane much of the time. So I´ve seen and heard what I need to create thrills in a novel. But I will not use my direct experiences without filter, for there is no need to involve other people than the characters in my novel.
On the contrary, my characters are fictional persons with no reference to any living or dead souls. They act in a fictional world that could be real, however. For daily around the world, there are people getting seriously hurt by psychological violence.
And we should handle it much better than today. The consequences are as severe as physical violence, if not even worse some times.
From endless puzzle to drafting a novel
These past two months have been hectic and interesting. I´ve learned so much from other writers and I´m beginning to realize the size of my work in progress (WIP). There is yet so much to learn and to test out, but soon there will be a whole month to practice it all.
At the moment, it seems like an endless puzzle to solve. But is is the best challenge that I have ever taken up. It feels so right to write that novel now at this time of my life where I have every possible chance to create something worth reading.
Now, it´s late afternoon, and the winter darkness it lit up by my husband´s outdoor Christmas tree. He was so happy decorating it Saturday afternoon, and it is kind of cozy to have it standing right outside my windows to my creative den.
On my table are some of my many notes, a couple of books, and my writing gear to carry around the house (and the garden when spring arrives). It is like piecing together a giant puzzle where you don´t know the end of it yet.
I think of making cards for my storyboard with short character sketches, notes about setting and mood, and scene lists. I think it is a good idea to use a storyboard to get an overview of the novel structure on the way towards writing it. That way it is easier to move things around if necessary.
It will also be a welcome change to be creative in more than one way. To be creative while writing the novel is essential to me since I enjoy being creative in everything I do. And everybody needs a break from time to time.
Today, I´ve taken quite a few breaks. My osteoarthritis is irritating and won´t leave me in peace, so I take extra breaks instead of more prescription medicine. The worst part is when it hurts my hands, so it is painful to write in hand or to make creative projects.
Then, I admit, I may speak a few not so nice words and thunder at the Universe for some time. But it won´t take the pain away, so I only speak of pain when it is a bad pain day indeed. As it is today where it has been almost impossible for me to feel warm, although I have the central heating on.
I have also taken into consideration that I have some mental and physical ailments that might require a day off once in a while. Therefore, I have put aside nine months for my drafting period, so that there should be plenty of time to write the first draft of my novel.
Next Monday, the process continues to the writing part. I can´t help it, little by little I have begun writing down snippets that I hope to evolve during 2020. So Mote It Be.
Thoughts about blogging in 2020
Concerning the blogging part of my writing, I consider only writing one blog post per week. I will let you know soon, dear readers, what I decide to do, but this is a very possible scenario. I need time to write 4-500 words per day for my novel.
And until I know whether I´m able to write that on a regular basis, there must be a certain amount of elasticity in running a blog, too. I have decided, however, not to assign any money to the blog, for the time being, the reason being that the budget is not for both this and the Grammarly upgrade.
We live in expensive times and prioritizing a budget before anything else has never been more necessary than now. It is so easy to go out and spend a lot of money on something so uncertain as to the succes or failure of a blog.
But I believe that my readers read this blog because they like what I write. And to me, the main focus must always be on the content rather than the wrapping of a blog. Quite frankly, I think that many out there seriously need to look closely at their prices versus their offered services.
There are no guarantees in this world or in anyone else that buying a lot of extras will help propel the blog more forward than hard work and engaged determination. And I´m not a gambler with any kind of money, especially not the money for the extras that make the blogging life money-oriented.
It´s all about money so many other places today that I believe it is necessary to calm down a lot. We cannot keep spending and consuming as we do today. It´s the wrong signal to send while the Earth is fighting for its and our lives because of our way of misusing its resources.
No, things need to change, and the only way they do that is when we each decide to do something different than we do today. Here we re-purpose everything possible to re-purpose, we sort our garbage, and we choose carefully before we buy anything other than daily necessities.
I´m not dependent on having a blog as an income source, and throughout my life, I´ve learned the hard way that there isn´t any easy money on the loose anywhere. Success demands hard work and strong-willed concentration.
Besides, I´m not running a blog to become rich. I´m content with my life as it is now, and I would rather live on a strict budget than would I loan money to spend on unnecessary items that so many others seem to be doing in the country I live in. No, being debt-free is freedom to care deeply for.
It is getting close to dinner time, so I´ll wish you a creative week, dear readers. I hope that your projects will be successful, and I send you all the positive energy I have to give. May your dreams turn into reality.
The Northern Witch' s Blog 