I feel changed. Nothing feels quite the same anymore. And yesterday took its toll on my strength. And once again, I had to handle the beginning of a major anxiety attack with music in my ears as soon as possible.
Then a couple of minutes with long, deep breaths before I felt that I could face life again.
Today, I did the same thing around noon after my little home school.
Living in a changed world is different, it feels uphill at the moment, and it will demand a lot of us all for a long time afterwards, maybe even permanently.
Our Prime Minister has prolonged the closing down of society. And there might be more to handle later on. So, this is an involuntary journey, where the major task is to keep on trucking, in slow-motion however.
I feel swept off my feet, that the world spins faster than ever before, and that this is bad, this is terrible, this is scary.
But the music helps me cope with the inevitable changes that life throws at us right now. It is a sacred space, where I cry my heart out and get up on my two feet again and again.
And the writing allows me to track my progress. I have found new strength in the simple pleasures of life. The laughter of children on the trampoline, lying together, looking for funny pictures in the skies.
A bonfire in the garden, a walk with the little, wise, old dog, and a quick talk with a local resident, on a distance, but heartwarming nevertheless.
Staying home is not hard in itself. It´s the reality that most people go through right now. It is the feeling of recurrent change that keep playing tricks with the mind.
I wish and hope that everybody understands the necessity in staying home, no matter how long a day may feel after a while. We should only go out when we need to shop our daily necessities and medicine.
Even our Queen has canceled her 80th birthday. More than 100,000 people are planning to sing for anyway, only at home out of the windows. I will do it too.
The remains of the day is dedicated to my novel. I need a larger break from the news stream tonight. And fiction these days are overhauled by reality.
So it will be a welcome break to simply sit and write and listen to Mother Earth. She breaths better these months, we breathe better. Maybe that is a sign of healing in the midst of distress.
My rituals have been boiled down to one. I will combine my garden blessing ritual with as many healing elements involved as possible.
There will be candles, essential oils, crystals, incense, and my strongest witchcraft symbols represented on my altars. I will celebrate it with a family member and close friend who lives right next door.
And I will write about here so it may inspire others to try to do their kind of magick.
Please take good care of yourself, dear readers and followers.
So mote it be.
The Northern Witch' s Blog 