Day: August 19, 2020

Yesterday was a bad day. As in really bad. I was angry. And I don´t like being angry whatsoever.

It is not important what I was angry about. The result matters. It totally ruined my day. And my husband´s too.

We did not fight. We felt bad. It was tiresome, annoying, and a complete bad feeling that only faded due to falling asleep.

So, I´m recovering from a bad day today. And I can feel it in my body, mind, and soul.

Today, I need to relax and practice some serious self-care. That will be with the setup of my new cell phone.

With my work with the dark goddesses, and with good bass sound in my ears while writing this.

Went through my emails for the first time in 5 weeks. Began yesterday afternoon and was done this morning.

I have had a lot of offline time lately. And I really appreciate that because being online all the time isn´t healthy to anyone.

My counselor also warns me to take much better care of myself. I need not complications of any sort in my life as it is right now.

My problem is that I´m happy and content, but the world around me is hitting the crazy button way to often to my great dislike.

Recovering from a bad day means that it is uphill once more. I always get extremely tired after being angry, and therefore I need to rest.

Right now, I feel somewhat better compared to yesterday. But I´m not yet ready to face the outside world, so I stay inside today.

I feel overwhelmed, mentally drained, and have an ache in my heart. The price of love is up for payment.

I need to withdraw for a while, I need to feel inner peace and freedom again, and I need to take extra good care of my self-respect.

Behind all this mess, I feel grateful that life taught me the hard way to work through whatever challenge I may encounter on my path.

Way too many people today never learn that every action has a corresponding consequence.

And, as a result, they tend to get hysterical and unreasonable when they can´t have it their way.

I just hate to have to say no to somebody or something. But I know I have to because otherwise I will compromise myself.

And if there is one thing that is not for sale, then it is my self-respect. Not anymore anyhow.

In my younger years I dreaded saying no. As a result, the shit hit the fan every time I failed in taking good care of myself.

I don´t regret helping people. But I may regret the people I tried to help. Therefore, I´m extremely careful now when I get close to other people.

Recovering from a bad day takes time, strength, and it overshadows my happiness, which annoys me the most.

But anxiety behaves also today. I´m better prepared this time, and I´m proud to tell that my strategies work as they should.

It makes me tired, however it is a fair price to pay for inner peace after being angry for the right reasons.

I´m only angry when something is so much enough that there has to be made a statement and shown an example for others to acknowledge.

It used to take me days to recover from being angry. Now, it is hopefully only a single day taken out of the calendar.

Tomorrow, my plan is to begin all over gain by getting up with the sole aim of making the most of the day.

Recovering from a bad day is necessary, but how I wish that it was not happening.