The rain is on its way again. The clouds gather strength by the hour. And the last day of Summer is strange, yet so familiar. Things happen fast nowadays.
A decision has been made. A new family is settling roots. And in the middle of the hurricane am I. By choice and by consequence. I have chosen side, I support a friend and let another go. And it hurts.
At the same time, I´m happy to witness that a friend has found the love of her life. So it is bittersweet to some degree, it is difficult to stand by and wait, and it is tough on my body, mind, and soul.
But I´m in a better mood now that I´m working every day with my many and debilitating ailments. They are here to stay, so I might as well befriend them and make the most of everything on my path.
The last day of Summer is always tough on me because I´m not a Winter person. I prefer the Spring and the Summer. The wheel of the year, however, turns whatever I want it to or not.
Today, at last, I can speak loud about what´s on my mind these days. Writing between the lines is an art, but in the end I go for the truth in what I experience in my life.
So, my dear friend now knows what I speak about, when I mention the love that I have for my sweet husband. It is a bond for life, it is real love, and it is a friendship.
Everything here is based on five little words. Trust, respect, love, loyalty, and hope. Mighty words to live after but realistic, if you only dare to trust your inner gut feeling and the language of your heart.
I´m so proud of my dear friend, who is more and more like a daughter to me. Tonight, we will tuck in the kids, raise our glasses and toast ourselves, the love of our life, and talk about what matters the most.
Now I´m finally in the mood that suits me best. I´m more productive, I´m more caring, and I´m more the better me. And with correct medication, therapy, and iron will, it is possible to make dreams come true.
My new goals are now set : From February 2021, I will be writing daily on my novel. Until then, I will research my settings thoroughly so that my plot become realistic and thrilling.
And I will focus on bettering my mental health to its maximum potential next Spring. My novel has been intimidating. But now I fight my way through a pandemic era with it.
I know that I can write it next year. I have never been so motivated in my life before. At last, everything fits together. And I praise life for teaching me these radical lessons.
I know that I need to do more research than I expected. I have a set of high personal standards, because I care for my readers. It has to be worth reading at any time.
And I know that I need to perform well to not disappoint myself. Therefore, I need to do more self-care during this Winter. Which is not a bad idea, considered the fact that I need to be better to do it anyway.
I have not been the spotless and flawless daughter next door. I have not followed the straight path that I was told to walk. And I have not become the better me without putting up a fight.
But I have seen and heard everything I need to see and hear from a tough life, often in the fast lane. Today, I want a peaceful and calm life without too much drama in the everyday.
This last day of Summer, I feel happy, content, and free. On Monday, September 28, 2020, it is six years since my mother crossed the Rainbow Bridge. I will bring pink roses which she loved.
Now, I will listen to good music, relax, and meditate about life in general and love in particular. On Friday, I will give you a glimpse into my plans for this blog and write more about what happens in my life this Fall.
May your evening be life-affirming, mentally enriching, and beautiful, dear readers and followers. And may the rain pass quickly so that we all may enjoy this Fall. So mote it be.
The Northern Witch' s Blog 